Resources and supporting students

Supporting Students When the News is Distressing

As your school partner dedicated to supporting whole-child development, we support students in developmentally-appropriate ways.

In the Lower School (Age 2 – Grade 4), this may mean listening and offering a chance to process only if a child brings up the event. If parents/guardians have indicated that a student may need some extra support due to individual circumstances, the homeroom teacher or school counselor will make every effort to provide extra check-ins with the student or be especially observant of the student to provide adult support as appropriate.

In Middle School (Grades 5 – 8), teachers work to meet the needs of the group and the age group. This could look like guided discussions in advisories or classes with a current event curriculum. Regardless, adults will keep a watchful eye on all students, focusing on preserving their wholeness, dignity, and belonging.

In the Upper School (Grades 9 – 12), our practice is to create support and learning spaces for students. Students can expect intentional check-ins during Advisory, acknowledgment and time for reflection during Chapel, teachers, advisors, deans, and counselors making space for questions, and optional educational forums prepared for and delivered by our faculty members with expertise in the area. As with all our divisions, adults will closely monitor those students whom we know or anticipate might be struggling. For our boarding students, this includes ongoing or emergent support with our psychologist. 

Reach out if needed! We are here to care for and support your students.

If you anticipate a strong emotional reaction or receive questions from your student that you need help answering, please reach out:

• Early Childhood Program: Kathy Carpenter (kcarpenter@stab.org)
• Kindergarten – Grade 3: Your student’s homeroom teacher or School Counselor Megan Haas (mhaas@stab.org
• Grades 4 – 8: Your student’s homeroom teacher/advisor or School Counselor Stephanie Ressler (sressler@stab.org)
• Grades 9 – 12: Your student’s advisor, dorm parent (boarding students), or School Counselor Sophie Speidel (sspeidel@stab.org)
   

Basic principles to help you speak to your children

From Jamie Howard of Child Mind Institute:

We want our children to find out about big, important news from trusted, loving adults. If your child is in Lower School or older, it means they potentially will hear about this news and that you should consider having a proactive discussion with them. Your task is to assuage any worries and correct any misinformation they may be hearing.

An opener may be, “I’m feeling really sad about a news story and I’m wondering if you may have heard about it.” Then, meet your children where they are. Answer the questions that will naturally emerge. You know your children best. It is okay to go into less detail based on their age or ability to process this type of event.

Be calm and transparent. Talk to your kids about safety measures in place at school (ex: key fob entry on all doors, background checks for all teachers and staff, security patrols led by our expert emergency management team) and actions you take in your own home to provide a safer environment. Your children will reflect what they see in you, so be moderate in your emotional intensity.
 

Please continue to monitor and/or limit your student’s technology use.

Be mindful of the graphic content and abundant misinformation that spreads through online channels, including social media and gaming platforms. Consider in advance what your child may be exposed to online. You may consider using a technology monitor like Bark, or limiting or discontinuing use of social media such as Snap, TikTok, X (formerly known as Twitter), and Instagram.

At school, we will continue to support your efforts by teaching students at age-appropriate levels about media literacy and critical thinking, digital citizenship and online privacy, and the role of technology and mental health.
 

Resources

• Talking to Children About Tragedies (healthychildren.org from the American Academy of Pediatrics)
• Talking to Children About Violence: Tips for Parents and Teachers (National Association of School Psychologists)
• Explaining the News to Our Kids (Common Sense Media)
• How to Talk to Children about Difficult News (American Psychological Association)
• Helping Children Cope with Terrorism–Tips for Families and Educators (National Association of School Psychologists)
• How to Talk to Your Child About Gun Violence and School Shootings (Verywell Family)